In the Hall There Were More Than Fifty People
In the hall there were more than fifty people. I already knew many of them personally. We had communicated with them earlier individually, speaking for about an hour of their situation and of the Gospel. They were from different regions of Ukraine: Kharkiv, Luhansk, Donetsk, Zaporizhzhia, Kherson... People who lost everything — remained with nothing save their lives and hope for future return home... We regularly help them with food packages, clothing, medicine and whatever we can. So they trust us and treat us with respect. But I see in their eyes a pain that holds them captive in their inner world...
I began thus... My dear friends, I am very glad to see you alive and glad that we can help you. But I want to ask your forgiveness... For the fact that we do not fully understand you and your pain... We have homes, even if it is sometimes cold in them, our city is not destroyed and our loved ones and close ones are near... Friends, forgive me, but neither we nor the people around you can understand your pain, and so I very much ask you not to be offended at that coldness and misunderstanding with which you sometimes meet... In many locals surrounding you, their husbands, fathers and children died in the war to liberate your cities from Russian occupiers, so people have their own pain... I ask you to go down to their level and bravely endure this fact and the existing reality..." I saw how they all lifted their heads, surprise in their eyes... They saw: I understand what hurts them... Many had tears, and someone cried: "Thank you!"
When I further preached the Gospel and spoke of the Pharisee and the tax collector, they took active part, joked, laughed, and then came up and hugged me like their close friend. They were glad simply that I understood their pain, expressed sympathy.
After our small worship service a man came up to me who cares for his mentally ill wife, and whose mother, against the background of all the horrors of war, suffered a stroke. So he was forced to place her in a home for the elderly, where she would be cared for better than he could in a rented apartment. After words of gratitude for the meeting, he shared his pain in a trembling voice: from his house and his mother's house in Kherson region nothing remained... "I don't even know how to go on..." And I didn't know either.
My sorrow is that I not only do not fully understand the pain of many people, but see that I cannot delve deeply, lest they tear my soul apart and... compel me to action... It is sometimes simpler to serve than to understand and probe human pain... I think that blindness is a conscious choice, arising from a desire to avoid pain, complicity, and personal responsibility... The Levite and the priest are bright representatives of such heartlessness, against which the half-breed Samaritan is ashamed of every religious "dealmaker."
In part I understand the pain of the displaced, for I see misunderstanding of our situation in many of my acquaintances beyond Ukraine. Recently my friend, a pastor from Donbas, who left his home because of the invasion of occupiers (Kadyrovites settled in the dwelling), shared the pain of the blindness and indifference of his Christian friends in Germany. They indifferently and distantly tried to turn the conversation to another side, not even seeking to understand his grief and suffering. I sometimes receive letters or calls that cause astonishment... War causes an allergy to superficial and frivolous life. It is a fact: he who has not been in your "shoes" is incapable of understanding you. When you rejoice at the appearance of electricity and a siren announcing the end of an alert, then all photos of carefree life, posing against the background of palms, ocean or a "cool" car, besides sighs, provoke nothing else. Ecclesiastes was quite right when he said that "sorrow is better than laughter, for by a sad countenance the heart is made better..." We have life before and after... And in this world we live today...
The absence of desire in Russian Christians to understand our pain and suffering is one of the heaviest trials for us. It is not even about those who frantically "salute" toward the Kremlin and admire Putin. With them everything is clear. It is about those who, being "neutral" and "above politics," shut themselves in their "refrigerator of spirituality and heartlessness." It hurts not even from morality and repetition of Kremlin stamps in accusations, but in the absence of Christian adequacy, understanding and elementary Christlike compassion. Believers who expressed their love and support at this time have become especially precious and close for life. Christian warmth overcame even many theological disagreements.
This shows how important it is for the soul to be understood and have compassion. Yes, we all need this... Simply it is impossible... Truly, no one, no matter how much they desire and try, can truly understand us...
I write about this because I want to remind myself and each one of the Gospel... I, like each of us, have He who always and truly understands us...
From birth they tried to kill Him, and He was forced to become a refugee.
All His life Jesus was rejected and misunderstood by all those whom He loved, even by His best friends and His own family. His loved ones died and perished. Those whom He served hated Him. He lost and left everything for our sake. Even already on the cross they pecked at Him and finished Him off, all from the crowd who passed by and mocked: from priests, soldiers under the cross to the robbers who shared in His suffering. He hung there and remained there Alone, protecting and saving us. This is Who understands us! He was here and walked in the flesh. He knows how to suffer with any pain. He is the True Sufferer and Support for those who trust Him. He understands everything... This is why I can rejoice in His understanding and complicity in my sorrows. He understands me...
And for this reason to me and to us all it should matter not whether others understand me and us... Whether they sympathize or are heartlessly cold, or, mocking, accuse us. The main thing is that He understands us. And since He lives in me, I can and must understand others...
I am called to delve into the pain and sorrow of those who need understanding. I am called not to fear another's sorrow, but to experience it together with the sufferers, that with His strength and zeal to serve them. Having overcome our sins on the cross and death in the grave, having risen and ascended to Heaven, Jesus descended into our heart, to walk in us today and serve through us. Christ gave us the unique ability to see beyond the window display and through the leaves of the fig tree into the depths of a person's soul, to understand him, suffer with him, and support him. It is for this reason that I know what to remind my soul of and what to say to those displaced by war in their sorrow... No one can understand, delve into their pain and effectively help, except He who has experienced it Himself and knows us better than all... Only His presence heals the deepest pain, transforms the heart and smooths the wrinkles of sorrow on the face. We most need He who always understands us.